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Closet Crossdresser (IV): The Control Freak Fights It

The Dirty Deedcrossdressing, domination, purging

Purging… That good ol’ standby of so many crossdressers who think tossing all of the feminine trappings they love -from the foundation of essentials they’ve just acquired to full wardrobes it took years to amass to cosmetics, wigs, and other beauty products- will make that desire to express their desires to crossdress and relish their sense of the feminine arbitrarily vanish.

Well… This particular control freak and lifelong crossdresser took purging to a new level!

Purging Times Ten

Despite his signing of of the submissive’s contract, Mr. Gotta-Be-in-Charge soon went on a fanatical purge. While he did get rid of some things, he didn’t he didn’t finish the “traditional purge” of eliminating ALL tangible representations and reminders of his feminization, such as lingerie, clothing, jewelry, and such. Instead, he took a more desperate route.

He tried to purge ME as his Mistress. He grumbled, he growled, he whined, he pushed – and he began actively trying to break every rule of the contract that he could. He was hostile, tried to be intimidating, and made every effort to try to make me jump ship and ditch my plans for helping his realize and accept his compelling need to be fully feminized and submit to a very strong woman.

He even went as far as blaming me for his labile mood, outbursts, and purging. I simply let him throw his tantrums and refused to abandon him, as I knew precisely what was going on with him.

…And It Just Keeps Going

On more than one occasion -via e-mail, phone, and even IMs- he went into a haughty frenzied rant, and acted like he was going to call it quits. Still I let him vent.

He tried silence, avoidance, raging, passive-aggressive behavior, and wildly raving about everything from why he shouldn’t want to crossdress or be submissive… to whose fault it was… to why the desire has never gone away… to how he didn’t know why he’d even called in the first place because he knew it wasn’t going to do him any good.

“If I Can’t Purge Mistress With My Outbursts…”

Since his carryings on with me were getting him nowhere, he branched out with his efforts: He tried his best to be the biggest asshole he could be at home, dealing his wife fits with his bad attitude and irritability.

Why had she not taken more interest in HIS needs and desires? He “didn’t want to make her do anything she didn’t really want to do” – but that only perpetuated his frustration. He didn’t want to “subject her to being dressed in front of her,” but why couldn’t he just explore feminization in private? He did not want to seek out a Mistress in-person because that would not be fair to her, BUT he needed to be able to be himself somewhere, somehow!

How do I know what he was thinking these things? He soon confessed to me how poorly he had been treating her – and everyone else around him.

An Unexpected Turn of Events

I decided the buck needed to stop at this misdirected hostility and unacceptable treatment of his wife.

It was time for this nonsense to cease, changes to be made, and addressing the bottom lines I knew were driving his deep, compelling, unrelenting lifelong desires to submit and crossdress. I knew it, and he knew it.

So he confessed his interactions with me to his wife – and he put her on the phone…

crossdresser, feminization, submissive, purgin

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